BREAKING: Bill Belichick to accept UNC head coaching position pending girlfriend’s admission into School of Nursing

By CFBNN Staff

December 10, 2024

Chappell Hill, North Carolina – UNC administrators have confirmed that the school and former New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick have come to a tentative agreement pending Bill’s girlfriend’s admission into UNC’s School of Nursing.

“He’s all in…if she gets in,” said one UNC athletic administrator on the condition of anonymity.

“At his age, Bill is concerned about convenience, so he wanted to be sure wherever he coached next, he would be able to pick Jordon up after class without too much of a drive.”

So what are we waiting on, then? Well, apparently Ms. Hudson hasn’t been granted admission, yet.

“The School of Nursing is a competitive one, and so we’re not 100% sure she qualifies academically. So, we’re waiting on some additional references—as well as personal guarantees from Ms. Hudson—to ensure Jordon has what it takes be a Tar Heel’r,” the anonymous administrator continued. “If all else fails, the athletic department has tutoring resources Coach Belichick and Ms. Hudson can use as needed,” our source concluded.